Tuesday, May 29, 2012

day 6. what the heck is a japanese ham sandwich?

day 6 and my energy is returning. something rises in me that reminds me of my old me; the me in me that knows how to get on the field and stand in the face of dragons. when there wasn't really a choice, something more me than me just got to it and kept me moving.

i am finding myself again in an unlikely way.

the room is thick, hot and smells like rotten beans. it's the only complaint i had today. this feels like progress.


today i could remind myself to smile.
i would smile and then things got lighter and easier.
every day so far i have been able to touch my gratitude for being here, being in this body, moving, sweating, stretching, standing and growing.
i can feel my years have settled me into someone wiser and more solid.
decades ago, when i first met this practice, i was fierce and full of possibility. the physical challenge was the game. i could dive into an asana and stay and, therefore, completely bypass the journey in a lot of ways.
now my body remembers, but needs more humility and patience. with this, comes the deep rippling of gratitude.
Injury is a gift in this way. Pain is a gift in this way.
when movement and growth come through that kind of briar patch, the experience is rich with joy.
I celebrate my body. I honor my limitations. I trust my pace. I decide and dedicate myself to open and become strong and flexible and balanced.
I dance my life.
I am here.

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