Surfacing

here’s what I know

the yolk exploded. it was overfull with overwhelm.

the other one, the physical, bruised.

it is true what I know.

every bone was broken in that last conversation.

I fell from the cliff. just like skeleton woman.

the sea of grief is rocking me now in my injury.

and the kibble in the cage last night broke the spirit from me.

back to resignation.

and, I’m told he is a sinister and insidious virus that comes in

and takes my lifeforce.

he is vile and stealth; not unlike what I have always known.

he simply has more sophisticated finesse with his danger.

father. I will keep singing from the murky depth of this terrifying place. You will always know I have my voice. You will always know I know the truth.

and lover, every mirror you have been, you will change from some dark and oblique transgression to my very soul into something bright and wonderful.

I will transcend this thick and murderous mire.

Your battles will not borrow me for currency.

even as I speak and cry this night, my readiness rises; my wings dry and flutter.

this sky becomes my own.

i will sleep tonight.

coo myself into dreams.

love myself wholly for all the wars I have endured.

these men, so broken and unmet, will dissolve and dilute over time.

i will crawl from the wreckage, lock arms with the fisherman and pull myself to shore;

restore by the fire, drink the tears and drum the heart that sees me