warrior.

fire.

and alchemy.

gathered around in a small circle in

celebration and welcoming and honoring my dear friend, Thembi,

here for only a few days before he returns to Africa.

He is now a sangoma and he shares with us his gorgeous wisdom and gifts; he tells us

of the land that is his home, his community, his family,

his new culture.

I am so proud of him; so grateful to call him my friend

someone, too, that I can still fiercely laugh with, dance with and be real with.

true.

and it's 1:30 am, but I want to write about an epiphany.

All the conflict that I feel in my life is the gifted resistance that I need to push my weight through something in my own self that has outworn its use. The pain I feel is my invitation to grow into something more true to who I am.

To bring forth me in all my strength and power.

I have a voice and it is my call to sing it.

This means that all the struggle I have felt within my family and how it stalls me out in the community is here for me to meet. To square off with the ways that I separate myself, shrink myself, speak and think to myself about how I have no room or rights, that I am not valued or appreciated.

It is becoming clearer and clearer that people may be reflecting that back to me (or not) but in order to see that it is always my choice to make.

Nobody can convince me of those faults and designs if I don't believe them.

trouble has been, I've believed them and been wounded by the reflection of living so small and cornered.

I have been my own worst enemy.

Time for this to stop.

I am growing into the best me I can be.

I am living a life that is heart centered and full of joy.

I declare this here and now.